Me: Hey God.
God: Hey You.
Me: Grief keeps sneaking up on me.
God: That's because grief is like a ninja.
Me: When will it leave me alone?
God: Hopefully never.
Me: What?!
God: To grieve means that you have loved. Grieving is one of the truest human experiences that you will ever participate in. It often arrives without warning - like a late day summer storm - obscuring the sun and drenching you in a downpour. It's a gift, isn't it?
Me: Uh, no.
God: Grab a pen and write the following four things down:
1) Grief can come and go as it pleases. You gave it a key to your house at the exact moment you gave your heart to somebody else.
2) Bereavement is the debt you must pay for having loved. There is no getting over the loss of a beloved who is now resting in the arms of endless love. Grief has no expiration date. Despite the passing of time, the phantom pain of mourning is always one memory away from returning.
3) Of all the emotions you face, grief is the by-far stickiest. It gets all over everything. Like peanut butter, grief sticks to the roof of you soul.
4) grief Is like an
afternoon thunderstorm
in late summer.
It's the storm
that's always waiting
on the edges
of your most sunny
days to roll
across the horizon
and right over you.
The ghosts of your loved
ones who have died
are the clouds.
The webbed lightning
Illuminating the
dark canvas sky is
their reminder to you
that life is just a
a brilliant temporary flash
of time.
It’s the reminder
to live now.
to be bold.
to be electric.
The pounding rain isn't your tears.
It's the hope of eternal life that falls
on you.
It's that downpour of hope that will
help you grow deep roots in love and faith.
The gale winds
of these storms are
the messages from
those you have
lost to death that
are whispering
to you through the pines
the following psalm:
"It's okay, my love. Eternity is holding me. Death isn't an end. Death is a threshold. I'm still here. I never left. Love doesn’t die. Love doesn’t die. I remain. There is no afterlife. There is only life. I’m here with you. Love doesn’t die."
Me: Okay...great...now I'm crying.
God: I'm proud of your tears of grief.
Me: You are?
God: Yes- because it’s proof that you have loved.
Me: Well, I’ve got all sorts of proof pouring down my face right now...
God: It’s all such an adventure!!
(From “Upon Departure”)
~ john roedel
Kate Elder
5th September 2023
Thank you for setting up this memorial to Doreen.
We hope that you find it a positive experience developing the site and that it becomes a place of comfort and inspiration for you to visit whenever you want or need to.
Sent by Geoff Leather Independent Funeral Director on 05/09/2023
I am I and you are you, whatever we were to each other that we still are.
Speak to me in the easy way which you always used.
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
Life means all that it ever meant, it is the same as it ever was.
Extract from a poem by Henry Scott Holland